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I'd much rather hang out with all kinds of people than fight monsters I can't even talk to. After all, there is nothing more complex and interesting than "people" in this world.
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...So, in this case? I would, yes. I wouldn't take any pleasure in it, since he's a good man, but I would do it if I had to.
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Truly a "good man"?
[ He thinks the opposite, of Vander. ]
Or have you convinced yourself of that?
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I'll put it this way. Back when we were partners, I was very much the brains to his brawn... But he truly, earnestly wants to do the right thing. He's just also easily led by others.
A loyal puppy, in other words.
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[ Christ. ]
I think one that is so easily swayed by others should perhaps hesitate more before taking action, don't you think?
Then again, I think "good men" so often are hardly good at all. Perhaps I'm biased.
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But I can't rebuke your opinion. I feel that there are good people out there, rare as they may be, and that's my own bias. Honestly, if anything, I worry that there are too many of those good people here.
They're the sorts that get into trouble because they think the best of others.
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Foolishly throwing ones life out for what they think is the best? Ceaselessly, endlessly making poor decisions? Perpetuating the status quo?
Is that good, Hugo?
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[ Phatheon comes to mind. He doesn't like the side of the equation that those two had landed on, since it's undeniably in opposition to his goals... But both Belle and Wise are good people. He has no doubts about that. So, to himself, he sighs. ]
We're separate from that, though. We're the people willing to do what's necessary, no matter what it means. Whether it's good or bad.
That makes us villains, but that's necessary.
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Or even good, and evil.
[ This is warped, of course, but Silco's philosophy is so baked into what he's experienced. To him, people like Lycoan or Vander could not be good. There was pain there, trauma. There was a willingness to accept the wrong thing. Because "people could get hurt", because it was "wrong". What did it matter if people were hurt through negligence? What did it matter if people were cruelly suffering the little cruelties? It didn't to them.
It was acceptable to them.
What good men were, Silco had long decided, were hypocrites. At least he knew this. Accepted it. At least he was one and did not deny it.
They did.
That's what rankled. ]
The only difference between us, and them, is the willingness to say what it is we are doing. They simply delude themselves.
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Maybe it's a bit childish to think of those hard choices in terms of heroes and villains like a story. But a villain is still different than a monster. The villain makes their choices. Even if the world views them as wicked, it's still their choice. But a monster... They're born that way. He can't help but think of it that way, because so much of his life has revolved around that distinction.
Is he just following in his father's footsteps? That's what he always dreads.
Hugo flips the phone back open with a sigh. ]
I don't disagree with that. Even if I think there's goodness within them, it doesn't change the fact that they're comfortable cowards. And in their cases? Traitors as well.
[ Even without knowing the full story, the basic beats are enough. Silco and Vander had shared a vision for change, just like Hugo and Lycaon. But they'd both been left behind. That vision for change wasn't strong enough in them, clearly. It still stings for Hugo all these years later, so he's more than certain it's the same for Silco. ]
I'm curious, though. Why "monster" in particular?
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[ Oh... here we go, Hugo. You get the speech. ]
Monsters are forces of nature. Terrible, powerful. Things that exist to destroy the status quo and leave society's wreckage in its place. They must become powerful to survive. People look upon them in fear, and they are worthy of it, but they fear nothing. They refuse to let anything stop them, in the end.
How great and terrible they are.
[ HE says monster because he admires them. ]
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And perhaps I'm just a little cowardly myself. Honestly, I don't want to be looked upon in fear. It's why I turned to thievery rather than assassination, though I have the skills for the latter. If I strike fear into anyone's heart, I want it to be some rich bastard that's afraid I'll pilfer their Dennies. Something ultimately meaningless.
And yet. I've been doing that work for years with little change to show for it. Petty changes and popularity with the people isn't as much as I'd hoped.
[ There's a pause, since this is opening up something bitter within himself to even ask, and he'd never dare share the full context. But. He repeats his father's words that he's never forgotten for a day. It's been on his mind more lately since he'd died, because it's exactly the sort of hostility that his Spectral friend stokes. ]
Someone once told me that only the most ruthless, cruel, and unscrupulous of people ever make it to the top. A monster.
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[ Oh, how he knows that one. Understands it. Is that not the truth in all things? Is that not a lesson he once learned? ]
I learned a secret a long while ago. That the only one that succeeds, in the end. It is not the strongest or the smartest. It is the one that can do anything to see their goals made manifest.
Only a monster can do that, at the cost of everything else. It is what we must do, if we wish to change the world. Otherwise, who wins? The ones who degrade us, put us in our places? The ones who have no scruples about throwing people into mines or profiting from their work or deaths. The ones who can look upon us as lesser, and do what they wish, because nobody has shown the power to stop them.
If there was a world where this did not exist... It has likely already fallen. Look at even this world.
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Maybe his father’s philosophy was right.
It doesn’t mean he forgives the man or even acknowledges it fully, because there’s still no doubt that he was an awful, evil person. The hell that he’d put all of his children through was proof enough of that, to say nothing of the Ravenlock family’s actual work in TOPS. Hugo would never accept his philosophy when pointed that way. It only brought more suffering into the world, and it’s why every single member of his family deserved their terrible death in the Hollow.
But it still gave Hugo a drive that he knew was unique. Jack had balked at just how clever and ruthless Hugo could be, and Hugo had accepted that. Maybe there was something wrong with him. Maybe it was better to hold to Jack’s principles to try and undo the suffering that he seemed primed to bring into the world.
…It’s embarrassing how much of his life had been vying for the approval of men that would never give it. Whether he was “good” or “evil”, it hadn’t mattered. ]
You know, you have a terrible habit of giving me unpleasant things to think about~.
[ He has to tease first once he gets to his reply. It feels better than being straightforwardly honest. ]
…Which is to say. You might be right.
Trying to do things peacefully gave little return. I tried to live by my mentor’s philosophy of never taking another life, and it didn’t work. If anything, it’s precisely what took away my friend and partner.
Do you ever regret it, Silco? Taking that sort of path?
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[ He knows what it is. He knows how it is. Why bother when the end result is the same? There's no reason to try, especially when it bars him from getting what he wants, or getting in his way. ]
Why would I? The other path was barred to me, from the moment I found myself in the Pilt. Really, even the days before, I should have seen it. My days were numbered.
That path was never opened to me, and if I had taken it, I never would have found a way to get us closer to where we needed to be. So no, I do not regret it. Why would I regret what had such measurable results?
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I've had many potential paths opened to me, but they're all of the sort where none of the options felt good. I think about those "what if"s often. More than I really enjoy, so I almost envy your confidence in the certainty of your path.
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The certainty comes from seeing the injustice, Hugo. Watching it happen every day. What do I care about murder, when we rot from breathing too much gas, or starve to death? What is one more death, when stacked against the piles of bodies I had to throw in the Pilt when they shot us on the bridge between our cities?
Certainty comes with suffering. Be happy that you have the ability to choose.
🎀
[ go woke white boy go ]
But as usual, you've given me a lot to think about, so thank you. I'm sorry again for being too candid about your identity as well.
Until next time~