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[totalize]

INBOX text / audio / video / action I'd much rather hang out with all kinds of people than fight monsters I can't even talk to. After all, there is nothing more complex and interesting than "people" in this world. art credit code credit

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[totalize]

[ He smiles faintly, but it’s one of deep understanding, even if it’s understated. That loneliness is what he’s felt as an underpinning for the vast majority of his life. It’d been so present that it was actually shocking to have befriended Jack and Lycaon and find out that things didn’t have to be that way.

…It’s just too bad it hadn’t lasted. At least when he’d welcome back that protective loneliness a second time, it’d been his own choice, more or less. Better to keep people at arm’s length than to experience the betrayal of being cast aside. He found the loneliness of loss far worse than the dull hum of it when he simply refused to connect to others.

The irony isn’t lost on him in this moment. He knows he’s staring at that chance to connect with someone in the face. He’s even the one that brought it up, and she’d answered in kind. Yet. It’s that last part, isn’t it? ]

—It’s why Imprints are so troublesome. It’s really cheating the natural progression of openness and vulnerability, isn’t it~?

[ He’s airy as he laughs, but there’s a tiredness to it. He cares deeply for all of his Imprints. He hates that the connection exists. It’s a complicated, contradictory feeling that’s also dangerous. ]

That is… I can understand why people encourage that. It even comes from a place of kindness, I think. I just also find that the walls we erect aren’t out of an unkindness in turn.

[ It almost sounds like he’s gently giving advice in turn to ignore those words of encouragement, but it’s not that. He wouldn’t go that far, because it’s not that simple. It’s just a quiet understanding of the hesitation. ]

[opposed]

The Imprint is challenging in all of the ways that I hate.

[ When one has a singular friend for so many years in a dynamic that isn't equal, the process of forming even normal friendships is difficult. Taking that, tangling it, making her question whether any of her feelings or the feelings of others represents truth, and then adding in all of these extra emotions around people who claim to be her friend... It's maddening. So much of her life has already been thrown into question. Now she struggles to know her very sense of self.

She cants her head in a half-nod, agreeing, though she's turning over his words just the same. ]

That, too, is harder than it seems. As you said before, some people here are not cut out for this environment, and I mean that in the kindest way I can. [ She does, honestly. ] Some people give their heart and trust to easily. And others take advantage of that.

[totalize]

As do I. Why, I have a feeling it’s our shared stubbornness on the matter that keeps us from Imprinting, in fact. Not that it’s a complaint, mind you, but it’s funny~.

[ He’s Imprinted with people for less, after all. He’s Imprinted people almost against his own will, as the scars of Set’s teeth in his bones remain as a testament… But that’s why he’s actually glad that the two of them haven’t, in a way. It feels like a more genuine connection as a result. ]

But I know you mean it kindly. I wouldn’t have expressed my own thoughts on the matter if I didn’t think you would understand what I meant.

[ Especially because he intimately understands how easy it is to use trust. He’s a conman and a thief, after all. Half of his work before a heist was just being friendly and charming enough for someone to trust him with information they really shouldn’t have. Even if he can couch his thievery in a principled stand, he’s still fully aware of the crueler parts of the process.

He sighs, but it’s with a light-hearted, slightly overdramatic humor. ]

My kinder hearted fellows really do stress me out. Admirable as wanting to save the world may be, goodness, they’re so quick to trust Patho-Gen’s words about the matter! I’d knock some self-preservation into their thick heads first, really.

[opposed]

[ It's true. She hasn't offered such a thing because it's simply too vulnerable a prospect, and now that they've discussed Silco, she also doesn't wish to put Hugo in a more difficult situation. But they are more similar than either of them say, the both of them fully understanding the depth of the issue. Mel doesn't say it outright, that she regards Hugo kindly (and would call him a friend if such a word were easier for her), but it means something that he can acknowledge it.

Mel's sigh is equally a little dramatic, though not quite matching his own. ]

Once upon a time, I was willing to hear them out. Were it my world in danger, I can't say the people of Runeterra wouldn't stoop to such a thing. But the lack of transparency and their continued nonchalance told me enough. And that was before the rest of this.

[ There's a shake of her head. ]

Don't overwork yourself, now, trying to drill it into people's skulls.